Accompanist Ramblings

So I guess I have a love hate relationship with the piano. Well... it's mostly love, but sometimes it can be a little stressful. Take today for example. Joanna calls me up and says she wants me to accompany someone at her big Christmas party thinger. Some professional singer. That's just a little intimidating non? But that's okay. Then one of her friends calls me up and apparently I'm accompanying him too. Alright. So we decided to have a practice today(the day before the party and I haven't ever seen any music. Great.).I go just expecting to play one song for each of them. Next thing I know I'm sitting at the piano in the Lieutenant governor's house with six pieces to sight read and have ready by tomorrow. Baahh!! I guess they just must've liked my sight reading so they kept piling them on me. But no one ever seems to realize that my sight reading and my performing are totally different. I guess we'll see how it goes tomorrow. Geeze though. Not that I care that much, cuz sometimes it's more exciting, but dude! I'm a little concerned. I think it'll be okay, but dude this is supposed to be a crazy 47$ per ticket party. People are expecting real entertainment. Yikes! Can't they find a real accompanist? I like that I can play the piano occasionally but holy smokes incompetent pianst! I'm just a willing accompanist and I enjoy doing stuff like this, but I know full well there are plenty of crazy amazing perfection pianist out there to choose from. Just like at my ward Christmas party the other night. I was supposed to play for a clarinet trio... sight reading again on the spot. That would've been alright, but then the trio backed off at the last second and canceled. They still wanted me to play though so they had me sight read the clarinet accompaniment while the whole ward sang Christmas songs. Sometimes the ward would sing something totally different from the accompaniment so I'd have to just improv. Now there are some crazy good pianists in my ward so it was really intimidating. And of course there's the mother of all my accompaniment stories that being the Ballet class I played for this last semester. That was the thing that stressed me out most this semester. Yeah I don't think I need to write how sad that is. But hey their fault for hiring me. We'll see if they decide to keep me next semester or not. Did you know that guy that plays for the BYU auditioned choirs is a ballet accompanist? Talk about intimidating and a half! Phew. Anyway so yeah we'll see what happens tomorrow. It's bad enough that I'll be sitting next to some creeper guy my age and probably end up having to dance with him. Now this. Gosh it'll be nice to be over. All I can say is that it will be some more good experience to gain. But dude when will I ever stop just getting experience? I guess that's what this life is about. Thanks for listening to my piano woes. I like piano a lot. I'm named after a pianist. Playing the piano is like living up to myself. But holy cow I'd like to think I have the right to be the humblest pianist in the world. Dude! Wish me luck tomorrow.
Ps one good thing about piano: Yesterday I was thinking,"My kids definitely have to have piano lessons. Oh gosh piano lessons are expensive sometimes. Dang! Wait! I can give piano lessons! Ta da!" It was a happy moment. See the piano isn't so bad after all:)
PPSS want another inspiring conversation I had with myself? So I was in the shower the other day and my self said," Kathryn, you really need to serve a mission."
Me: Yeah I think you're probably right. You know what? I'm going to serve a mission. Thanks self.
A while later.
Self: You know you should start preparing for that don't you think?
Me: Uh... Yeah.... Umm... Doesn't this shampoo smell great?

List Yourself

I like my List Yourself book. I'm going to try some out on a blog cuz they're so fun! Here we go. Now you'll know how vain I am.

ANIMALS THAT SCARE ME
-Snakes!
-Mice
-Ferrets
-Magpies
-Earwigs
-Hawks
-Skunks
-Porcupines
-Muskrats
-Hedgehogs sometimes;- Goffers

NAMES BEEN CALLED
-Kathryn, Katie, Kate, Kat, Kathy, Kathleen-o-roon, Katy-lu, Lindsey, Catalina, Katie-bug, Kat-ryn, Taffrin, Aunt Snugly, Joanna, Mahanna, Kaa, Kath, Crazy Kathryn (CK), Lay-up Queen, Professional, Pumpkin, Kitty, Little-K, Miss Larsen, Kathleen, Skin'n Bones, Kate the Great, Rebecca/Becky, accompanist, Katrina, stick, sunshine, Kitty-Kat, Elmo Girl, Klutch, Bethesda, Deltapapalina, Communist Pig, Dude/dudette, You with the head/hair, Kathryn the Great, Kristen, Dear, Moo-a, Larsen, Greg's little sister,

IF I WEREN'T SO AFRAID I'D...
-Sing. Loud. Everything
-Talk to people
-Wear tanktops in public
-Dance
-Smile at boys
-Look people in the eyes
-Say everything I want
-Tell people I love them
-Buy more things at the store
-Perform in front of people
-Dive
-Wear make-up
-Flirt
-Wear tall shoes
-Laugh
-Not hesitate so much
-Skip everywhere
-Travel
-Tell "boy jokes"
-Stand up for myself
-Boss people around a little bit

JOBS I'VE HAD
-Babysitter
-Fruit picking and selling
-Deseret News Paper Deliverer
-Orem Public Library Page
-Piano teacher
-Harold B. Lee Library Shelver
-Ballet Accompanist

COMPLIMENTS I RECEIVE ON A REGULAR BASIS.. OR HAVE JUST RECEIVE I've thought a lot about this one obviously. See did I not warn you about vanity?
-like your shoes
-You look cute today
-You're a very hard worker-Roger
-You smell nice
-I need to remember to be more like you-Camilla
-You're so nice to everybody
-You're the most self-less person I've ever known-My foot
-You'd be quite the catch-Dani
-You'll never have to worry about your weight
-You're going to make some man really happy
-You always find everything-Mom
-You're hilarious
-Shes so cute- Communist pigs... especially relief society communist pigs
-You're so fit-Christine
-You're good at the piano
-You're beautiful
-You've got defined arms-Greg
-You have a strong arm
-You're like a sister to me
-You can't say anything mean about anybody
-You have so much energy all the time
-You're always so happy
-You're amazing/awesome
-You're so weird-Nikki
-She's so sweet-Bleh
-You are a wonderful girl. You present yourself very well.-Bishop Dort
-You know who's got some guns on her? Kathryn-Lisa Evans
-Where do you get all your energy?-Ben Ford
-You're enthusiasm makes me feel happy-Rebecca Johnson
-You're a professional-Dang I've forgotten the name of my old tennis league coach!
-Good accompanist. Follows well.-Judging sheet
-You're always so nice to me-BreeAnne
-You're really good at tennis
-You're such a good roommate-bleh
-She can throw a football 40 yards-Nic LeChemenaght

THINGS THAT MAKE ME CRY
-Pretty much nothing... but...
-Feeling small and insignificant
-Feeling bossy
-Arguing
-Not being able to love
-Halocaustesque things
-Feeling misunderstood or betrayed
-Losing trust
-Not having a direction in life
-Abused children
-Really ignorant people who hurt others without noticing or caring
-Being fearful instead of faithful about certain decisions...
-"Some Things Are Ment to Be" from Little Women
WHAT I LIKE TO DO WHEN I'M ALONE
-Clean
-Perfect difficult things on the piano
-Sing
-Cook
-Talk to myself
-Day dream
-Look through scrapbooks and yearbooks
-Make faces in the mirror
-Drive
-Listen to music
-Organize
-Write
-Cry
-Practice talking-read the newspaper out loud
-Run
-Shoot hoops
-Read... in the hammock that used to be under the cherry and apple trees with a Popsicle
-Chomp loud on cereal and carrots
-Build sand castles
-Shave my legs
-Do nails
-Water the front yard
- Write notes
-Talk on the phone
-Try new food
-Weed
-Watch old movies
-Carve walking sticks
-Play video games
-Dance
-Talk with accents
-Play tennis against the garage
-Rake leaves
-Mow the lawn
-Collect snails
-Hum
-Vacuum
-Talk to my stuffed animals

Wow that was a lot. I get carried away so easily with this. It's so fun! Y'all should try it!

Thoughts for the day

Wow

Well I'm at home right now. Yeah home home... Orem. I should probably be studying for my big midterms next week and finishing all my French homework, but hey why not write a blog instead:) Speaking of French. Dude that's a pretty vigorous class this year. Before every class we have to read these 10-16 page papers in French about French literature. But it's actually kind of interesting. Like a French Humanities class. Sure there's lots of writing and reading comprehension but I think I actually have time for it this semester. I'm not taking nearly as many credit hours as I have in the past, but I'm still on campus a bunch... mostly working I guess. Work. Work is going okay I guess. The library isn't half as bad when you don't have a supervisor glaring down your throat all the time. Joanna was right about moving up on ladders. But the library is still the library. You know not as efficient as it could be and extremely dull--the typical library ramblings still exist(Ps did I tell you they told us to start taking books off the shelves randomly so the new shelvers would have more to shelve? Gosh! At least the shelving system we've devised on our floor doesn't allow us to have to deal with that "problem"). Anyway at least I get paid more. That's nice. I've also started being a ballet accompanist. Woah beans! Yeah. I feel way too incompetent for that. I stink, but hey they hired me. Too bad for them. It's a really good experience for me though. It can be stressful at times, but I'm learning a ton and I love sight reading. But pretty much ballet encompasses all my weaknesses on the piano, so all I can do is try my best. It's fantastic. Oh and I finally quit the Orem Library. :( I'll miss it. So will my retirement account. It was growing well. :) I could've planned my death by cancer a couple years earlier. Good old OPL. Sigh. Oh but I got a card from them in the mail today. It was really sweet. You know how sometimes you get the cards that are just like,"HAGS!"And you're like,"dude why d'you even write?" But this card actually had stuff in it worthwhile you know. People actually knew me. That was surprising. Well I guess I had been working there for... 3 1/2 years? Plus a butload of volunteering before that. They better have known me:) Jk. I'm looking forward to the free Saturdays though. Wait why am I telling you all this? I think someone forgot to write in her journal. Oh wait! Now I remember what I was going to write. I just realized that tonight will be the first night I've stayed overnight at my house by myself since I moved to Southridge. Weird eh? I'm probably not going to be home as often since I don't have the Orem library excuse anymore. Maybe I'll even start paying to do laundry. It's just strange. I'm almost turning into a real college student. Tonight I realized all I do when I come home is raid the refrigerator and do my laundry. But it's my house! Weird. Sometimes I almost feel like a guest. Everything changes. I still haven't gone upstairs to my room yet since... the beginning of last month? Geeze now I'm worrying what is in there. I better go check. Actually I'm just falling asleep so G'night. Wait it's Conference Weekend! Yay! Dude I could use a butload of inspiration. I'm pumped. G'night.Ps highlight of my day today: Tennis! Tennis! Tennis!:) Finalment! 'night 'night.

:)

I want to be irreplaceable 

Laurel and Hardy!

How Well Do You Know Yourself?

If you decided to actually read this, just know that it's Sunday night and I don't have anything to do but write right now. So this is a rambler and a half. Don't say I didn't warn you. It's one of those: exploring Kathryn's mind on the spot posts.
So stuff has been happening lately that has made me question my own judgment of me a lot and I'm thinking,"Dude I don't know myself worth beans!" Do you know yourself? Gosh all the things I think I'm good at turns out I'm not that great at, then things I think I stink at lots of people say I'm good at. I always assume it's flattery but sometimes it's not. I don't know who to believe anymore! The main thing that brought on all this questioning right now is the piano. I love playing the piano. Almost to a fault. I've always thought, and had decided that I knew I wasn't that great at the piano but it was just something I enjoy. For the heck of it(well not really, I was embarrassed out of my pants, it was my mom's doing) I auditioned to be a ballet accompanist at BYU. I thought the audition went horrible! It was all sight-reading and I was nervous and the whole time I was thinking,"gosh I could do so much better!" Then at the end of the audition, the auditioner lady was giving me all this advice, and music suggestions, introducing me to people and even telling me where to clock in. I was like,"dude you're not going to hire me. What are you doing? You heard how terrible that audition was." So anyway she told me they couldn't hire anybody till fall, but to give her my availability anyway. So I did and then forgot about it, cuz there was no freaking way I'd be good enough to play as a paid pianist. Auditioning was just an experience. But then a couple days ago she emails and says,"hey we want you in the fall." And I about pooped my pants. Holy incompetency!! I was not expecting that whatsoever! I'm scared to death! Ahhhh! I can't get up at 8! I can't keep a steady tempo! I'm seriously going to die!! So yeah that really threw me off big time. I thought my audition was bad. BAD. Then I get something out of it? What?! I just don't know what to expect anymore. Especially with the piano. Every time I'd perform stuff at recitals n'stuff back in the day I'd be like,"woah! Hope no one heard all that. Yikes!" Then I'd come back to sit down and my brothers would laugh at me for being critical of my performance claiming it was flawless. But it totally wasn't! Ahhh! I just really don't know anymore. The other day when no one was home I recorded myself singing at the piano. I've always,"known," I'm a bad singer. But actually listening to myself sing I realized, "well... I'm not a tone death screaming banshee."There's lots of room for improvement there still though. Wait! What do I know? Anyway If I can't tell whether I'm doing something well or not how can I tell anything? Am I that bad at judging other people too? Guess that's why we shouldn't judge eh? You know that thingy that says the way you judge you shall be judged? Yeah well... in my opinion(which we've now discovered is quite questionable) I tend to judge other people pretty nicely. I usually give the benefit of the doubt. If someone cuts in front of me with the car I think,"oh he's just in a hurry. He's having a bad day. He wasn't paying attention." I like to believe that people are generally good. No one is born a serial killer. No one plans on murdering someone. Just tiny little events build up to a point they feel they have to take action. People have good intentions, but they're also self-interested. Things get tricky when the self-interest rubs against other people's good intentions or self-interest. Gosh this sounds like American Heritage. Yuck. But that's what I believe. Not to mention I'm strongly against the death penalty. Wait a second I'm strongly against abortion too. Is that being judgmental? Ahh! Back to my first thought. So I think I judge other people pretty openly. However I think I'm pretty hard on myself. Or so they say I am. Well... yeah I guess I am. So then does the judgment I use on myself count with that ye shall be judged thingy? Or is it just for other people? Cuz ouch! I'd never make it to the celestial kingdom. Well anyway. See what happens when I start working with books for 8 hours every day? Once I get out of that library I just burst with thoughts and marvel that there are still people left in the world to talk to after I've been in 8 hours of silent solitary confinement. But yeah come to think of it I'm hard on myself. Does that make me have bad self-esteem? I know in High school I had some major identity issues at the end of the year. Wait! Did I? Or is that just self-blame? A cover-up? Me trying to find an answer and take responsibility for something someone else did? Holy crap! What am I doing this fall! I know. Yet another example of Kathryn's judgments. Then again what is that anyway? That judgment though seemed a little different. It better have been! See? I don't know!! So really it all comes down to what do we really know? Really we all know nothing. So do you know yourself? Do you think you know yourself? Maybe you do. Maybe you're clueless like me. Who even knows? I guess we all know who knows. That's probably the only thing in life worth being sure about. Am I even sure about that? Gee I sure hope so.

"I Figured it out!"

So finally I found the J'entends video. Man that was a while ago! Yay for French Choir! But dude probably the hardest piano accompaniment I've ever played in my life. I was seriously ready to hire someone else, but I'm glad we... er... survived I guess. Good stuff. Hey I think French Choir is up again next year! Y'all should be in it...:)?!Jk I won't be so forceful this time. But hey free credit hours! You can't resist
!:P

Bleh

So Mr.Tennis skirt is back. Ugh! But at least he's started going to church again. I hope it's not cuz I'm here again. I don't understand why the only people who show somewhat of an interest in me are the people who see me looking my worst working outside or in a tennis skirt. Thankfully I haven't been offered any rides lately. I'm probably just paranoid. Eww. Me of all people has no right to be paranoid over such an issue... that's not an issue! Well maybe he'll find someone nice in the singles ward. Good luck to him. He'll need it.

Weird Dream

Well last night I had a weird dream and I wanted to write it down. I'm afraid it won't compare much to a... certain dream lol, but it was weird. I like weird dreams. They're weird. I'm weird. Your mom's weird. So anyway I can't remember everything but I think it started out back at Heritage Halls, except it was actually my cousin's house. It was New Years eve and everyone was celebrating except Krusty the clown from the Simpsons(yeah I don't really like the Simpsons what was he doing in my dream?) who was downstairs in my cousin's room planning a suicide bombing that wouldn't kill anybody except him. So he had all these clown balloon bombs set up down there and some kind of fuse system where he'd light a fuse and the other fuses would light too I guess. So he tied himself up so he couldn't chicken out and lit the first fuse thingy, but the fuse that was supposed to blow himself up(the first fuse) was a dud or something, so he was like,"dang it Jim," and decided to escape. So he runs out, suddenly I turn into him and I tell everyone to get out there's a bomb in the building. I start running out with some short guy named Josh who was apparently in band in high school with me, but I don't remember any Joshes. We ran out from the Heritage Central building across a street(it was kind of hilly like something from the Avenues up in Salt Lake) And we turned back to look at Robinson hall(which was now apparently the building we'd just ran out of). I could see my old room through one of the windows and I saw myself in there sitting on my bed. Christine was there but Dani and Jake were in there too so it must've been awkward for the me sitting on my bed. Then I started watching little memories or something through the window, I don't really remember. Something happened. Apparently it was our last night at Heritage. Then suddenly I was me again in my room. Someone was videotaping and Christine and Tikla and I were trying to fit onto the same bed and go to sleep. Then it was morning time and everyone was gone. Then Christine walked in and I started talking to her and noticed that Nikki's bed was in our room, except it had always been there and that was normal. There was some certain stuff left out on her bed that I won't go into detail about, but I thought, good for her she doesn't care anymore. Then I went into the kitchen, it was my cousin's kitchen(lol the Kitchen's kitchen) and started doing the dishes. Dani and Christine started helping me and we finished but then these CD library holds(like these little blue boxes with paper around them and people's names written on them) showed up in the dishwasher. Dani and Christine said they were Nikki's so I thought, okay I'll let her do them herself(some people at the library are really picky about you putting away their holds for them). So I started back to my room(which was my cousin's library) and then I heard Nikki talking with Tikla back in Tikla's room(which would've been my cousin's deck) so I thought, what the heck we need to get these holds out before closing anyway so I'll just do them. And there you go there's the end of my dream. Weird huh? I bet you couldn't follow it. First dream I've had with Heritage and roommates in it since I lived back at Heritage. Strange, and I think I've been working at the Orem Library too much. Holds in a dream? Weird. Anyway there it is. I forgot a bunch though so maybe it would've made more sense. G'night(it's not night, but I felt like saying g'night so deal with it).

Sweet!

I love Youtube!

I Feel Like Stomping Grapes

So I made Orange Julius as part of lunch today. My mom wanted to use straws so she said, "do you want me to go downstairs and get some straws?" Ahh! Do you want me?! When did that happen? It used to bug me all the time when my parents would say,"do you want to go out and help me pour cement?" or ,"do you want to fold socks?" I always wanted to say, "No!... I really don't," and walk away. Instead it turned into,"No, but I guess I will," unless it's my dad asking then it's,"okay, sure," no matter what. But now my parents have switched tactics and they have to use an extra amount of guilt, forcing me to have to jump in. I hate being the youngest. My parents are getting old. They act like old people... and they are old people! I can't imagine being responsible for them when they can't do things for themselves. I guess that's my next big thing to work up to. If I ever have kids, my side of the family will seem ancient compared to the other side. Do you know anyone else my age with parents in their 60's? I've only met like 2 people. Oh well it's depressing but such is life. And David Archuletta lost. He has a good attitude about it though, and it really doesn't matter cuz he's freaking amazing. They had an interview of him in the newspaper today and my mom was pretty excited about it. This is such an exciting blog huh? Well my life's pretty unexciting, unless you like working outside and job searching. Here maybe I'll put up something exciting to make this blog more interesting. Okay so it's not that exciting but for some reason it's making me laugh today. I'm posting two. I guess I must be bitter about something. I don't know. Oh well this is a strange post. I promise I'm not turning into some violent person who laughs when people get hurt. Today is just a weird day.

My First Video Post

Did it work? Je voulais utiliser J'entends Le Moulin, mais je ne pouvais pas le trouver, alors voici ma niece Emily. Sorry I felt like writing in French today for no reason. I'm sure it's all grammatically incorrect but what the heck.

Me in 100 Words or Less

I'm cleaning out my room and Look what I found! Yay! I'm going to write some stuff out for old times sake... or something like that. Actually I just want to practice my typing... no... okay I'm just posting these cuz I feel like it. Ha! I got some books about confidence at work the other day like Fight Your Fear and Win and How to say No without Feeling Guilty. Yes!! I'm pretty excited. I also got a but-load of cook books. I can finally read not-text books! Hehe! Gosh I've really liked using hehe lately. 'Ight.

"Anyone who understands me has quite an edge, because I've never even come close to understanding myself. I like to make conversation in elevators, yet I cower when expected to say, "hi," to a friend. Sometimes I walk with a limp for no apparent reason, but I love to run and play sports. I cough when I'm not sick. Occasionally my left eye turns red. I don't make sense. Your judgment of my personality might be better than mine. If you want to know the real me, I only can wish you the best of luck."


Gosh I feel old now. I'm re-organizing my room and... sniff... I think it's time to finally get rid of my stuffed animals. Sigh. But they need a home! I can't just abandon them. Anyone have any ideas? I'm desperate. And I'm worried that the ones that stay with me will make everyone else jealous. Geeze this is going to be hard.

Ps the How to Say No Without Feeling Guilty book is debatable. I don't always agree with it. It says saying no makes you generous by making yourself more available to important things, instead of being accommodating and resentful. But dude lots of things I've felt obligated to do I went through with resentment but came out with a good experience. I don't know about you but most of my good growing experiences come from bad experiences. I don't think you should always say no to something just because you don't feel like it or want to. I usually don't mind saying yes to things I'm not excited about, even if it fills up my life with other people's endeavors. Saying yes is a good thing generally and hey where would the church be if everyone said no to their callings? I guess it can get out of hand though, but still. Anyway my big problem trying to say no is when I really can't do something for someone because of a prior obligation or other real/legitimate excuse, yet I still feel terrible for denying the person and I start sounding fickle and nervous as if I really could have done something for them but I'm making up excuses. I just feel bad cuz if I were in their position I'd feel really let down(but I actually wouldn't cuz I'm Kathryn, but it would make sense to feel let down and I don't like making people sad). The same thing happens when I argue with people. That's usually why I cry. I understand the other person's point of view and then I start fighting against myself when myself also has an understandable point of view. It stinks! The pot situation would be a perfect example. I just wish there was some way I could say what I think plainly and not feel like a dork or mean boss. Anyway everyone at work probably thinks I'm emotionally unstable cuz I always get books from the emotional health section during the summer (150's btw). Weirdo! But dude that's a good section! Last summer I got What to Say When You Don't Know What to Say and it changed my life. Oh and Don't Sweat the Small Stuff is pretty good too. Ps did I use fickle right?
Pps I've decided to write at least one blog a week like I used to. Wish me luck. And I think this deep journalish blog invites a blog on empathy for next week and crying. Dude I've read too many emotional IQ books already this summer. Man this is a long post. Where did I find time to write this?... Oh yeah I need a bedtime and a job still.

WHAT?!

So I just decorated a box. What the heck! Who does that?! Wait... I know exactly who. ;) Gosh I lived with girls for way too long. But I miss them!

Deer

I am most definitely a deer. I've been thinking about it lately, and probably that's the closest animal that fits my personality next to a geni pig or a bunny. Deer are just weird. I like to imagine myself as someone fun and crazy, but really, no matter how interesting things get deep down I'm pretty quiet and demure. Did I use demure right or does it mean something else? Anyway, I don't like being a deer. I've been a deer all my life and I've tried to grow out of it. Sometimes I like to believe that I might have turned into a cat or monkey or something, but really no matter how hard I try, once things even out I start being a deer again. Deer are so weak. At the slightest sound their tail gets stuck between their legs and they run away. Deer can't ever stand up for anything. Now don't get me wrong, deer do have their moments. Sometimes their ears perk up and they jump and bound around with lots of energy. Most of the time though they're just trying to peacefully chew on their grass out in some secluded field or mountain. Deer have pretty plain social lives.Then along comes a scary lion or something and they run away (hey and I'm not the worst runner in the world either, jk :)). When will the deer ever fight back? It really stinks being a deer. Yeah deer are nice and cute, but it stinks(yeah I guess deers do smell pretty bad)! Deers don't have lives! When will they ever do something worthwhile and try out some kind of new food or something. Deer are just scared and wimpy and hopeless animals. They're peaceful, but peaceful is so dang boring!! Sigh. Well this post isn't depressing at all. Okay I'll admit I've been really grumpy today. Don't ask me why. I think I'm just sad probably. Sad and scared for summer. I seriously almost cried this morning. I've really enjoyed living here at Heritage. Sure there have been ... different moments, but altogether, I'm not sure if I'm ready to leave yet. I miss things kinda badly and well I don't know maybe I'll try to be happy. G'night.
Ps you know what? Deer can take leaps and bounds. Hymph I'm going to do it. Ppss or whatever Hey maybe there's a jack-a-lope around,"bound, bound, bound and rebound!" Dude I love that short!
PPssskskskaopiewjrqjf I forgot to mention I resemble a deer too. And my mannerisms. Wouldn't you agree? I'm a deer. Sigh. I'm okay with it though. For now I guess.

Sam's smile

SAM'S SMILE

The Fam

So I needed something to counter-act my amazingly long blog and I realized I've never posted a picture of the fam. So here's one at James's wedding. It's kind of embarrassing for me though cuz I didn't know we'd be taking pictures at this time so I'm still in my grandkid babysitting clothes. Yuck. But it's the last time we were all in the same place at once so voila.

Venting and a Half

I pick up Greg tomorrow. Holy smoking cow! Am I excited? I don't know. There's a butload of anticipation, but what if things are weird? So much has changed in two years.Wow. Just look at our house(which hasn't been finished in 17 years yes). The orchard is gone! There's a whole coldesac of houses back there. The back yard got wasted. Larsen park has walls in the middle of it. The lilac bushes are toast. There's rail road ties all over the place and there's a weird back entrance drive way. There's new shelves every where inside. Pretty much every room in the house has been re-arranged. The dishwasher is broken. There's a new laundry room. Who knows what's happened to the den. The garden has "mysteriously" moved over to the basketball court. There's a storage room underneath the deck. My favorite cherry tree is gone. So are a bunch of apple trees. There's no place to put your shoes anymore. There's storage in every bed room but the guest rooms down stairs. The garage is actually car accessible.What about me? Geeze. I don't even know. Why the heck am I living at Heritage? Since when would I ever buy myself a pink clock? Since when did I buy stuff? I have an entirely different wardrobe. I'm not afraid to wave at people I know...as much. I can make phone calls. I give hugs occasionally. I don't play any of the same piano music. I'm not afraid to say crap or that sucks. I can go places by myself. I'm in college. I never would've guessed I'd be where I am today.I don't know. Maybe I really am excited. I've missed Greg. A lot. Oh here we go with another list. I'm really into those lately. I've missed playing James Bond and laughing when I'm in a crummy mood. I've hated having to endure eating dinner with just my parents. Or going to family reunions with no one to conspire with. I miss trying to find a place to sleep while hiding from Mom in the morning and staying up late talking about life. I miss eating chips in the rain. I miss being coached by a loud Italian while I'm playing tennis. I miss sight singing at the piano. I miss sardines. I miss sleeping on the floor while Mom tries to read scriptures. I miss secret missions. I miss teaming up and dominating sports events at school and church. I miss shoveling snow and losing snowball fights. I miss teasing and ganging up on James. I miss hearing the suburban outside and racing downstairs so Mom wouldn't know we were watching TV. I miss having support when I'm helping Dad. I miss covering up for each other and creating fruit songs in the pantry. I miss making faces in the mirror while we brush teeth and trying out new hair styles. I miss sock fights. I miss all the competitiveFoosball games that would never end. I miss having to share my corn. I miss playing ali-oops and amazing catch. I miss selling cherries at the Kitchen's. I miss dressing up and acting out Mom's 50's music while we do the dishes. I miss having someone else who notices how dang slow Dad drives. I miss foot wars. I miss dead arms. I miss hiding from Grandma. I miss driving around at night, just talking or rolling down the windows and turning the bass way up. I miss fighting over who get's Mahanna during cold winter nights. I miss playing in the canal and irrigation. I miss getting dragged away from my homework to go play football. I guess I've really missed Greg. Actually I'm kind of proud of myself for surviving without him. You know I don't think I've ever really had a best friend. I haven't allowed myself to. I've had lots of close friends, but I think Greg and my dog are the only people I'd ever call my best friends. So you know what? I AM excited to see Greg again. I think I've been holding all that in for two years. Ahh it feels so nice to let it all out. I've been pretty nervous about Greg coming home, but you know what?There's nothing to worry about. He's my brother. He just better not turn into a slave immediately and he better save some time for his only little sister.
PS sorry about the picture, it's the only one I have. You gotta love Christmas mornings.