Me in 100 Words or Less

I'm cleaning out my room and Look what I found! Yay! I'm going to write some stuff out for old times sake... or something like that. Actually I just want to practice my typing... no... okay I'm just posting these cuz I feel like it. Ha! I got some books about confidence at work the other day like Fight Your Fear and Win and How to say No without Feeling Guilty. Yes!! I'm pretty excited. I also got a but-load of cook books. I can finally read not-text books! Hehe! Gosh I've really liked using hehe lately. 'Ight.

"Anyone who understands me has quite an edge, because I've never even come close to understanding myself. I like to make conversation in elevators, yet I cower when expected to say, "hi," to a friend. Sometimes I walk with a limp for no apparent reason, but I love to run and play sports. I cough when I'm not sick. Occasionally my left eye turns red. I don't make sense. Your judgment of my personality might be better than mine. If you want to know the real me, I only can wish you the best of luck."


Gosh I feel old now. I'm re-organizing my room and... sniff... I think it's time to finally get rid of my stuffed animals. Sigh. But they need a home! I can't just abandon them. Anyone have any ideas? I'm desperate. And I'm worried that the ones that stay with me will make everyone else jealous. Geeze this is going to be hard.

Ps the How to Say No Without Feeling Guilty book is debatable. I don't always agree with it. It says saying no makes you generous by making yourself more available to important things, instead of being accommodating and resentful. But dude lots of things I've felt obligated to do I went through with resentment but came out with a good experience. I don't know about you but most of my good growing experiences come from bad experiences. I don't think you should always say no to something just because you don't feel like it or want to. I usually don't mind saying yes to things I'm not excited about, even if it fills up my life with other people's endeavors. Saying yes is a good thing generally and hey where would the church be if everyone said no to their callings? I guess it can get out of hand though, but still. Anyway my big problem trying to say no is when I really can't do something for someone because of a prior obligation or other real/legitimate excuse, yet I still feel terrible for denying the person and I start sounding fickle and nervous as if I really could have done something for them but I'm making up excuses. I just feel bad cuz if I were in their position I'd feel really let down(but I actually wouldn't cuz I'm Kathryn, but it would make sense to feel let down and I don't like making people sad). The same thing happens when I argue with people. That's usually why I cry. I understand the other person's point of view and then I start fighting against myself when myself also has an understandable point of view. It stinks! The pot situation would be a perfect example. I just wish there was some way I could say what I think plainly and not feel like a dork or mean boss. Anyway everyone at work probably thinks I'm emotionally unstable cuz I always get books from the emotional health section during the summer (150's btw). Weirdo! But dude that's a good section! Last summer I got What to Say When You Don't Know What to Say and it changed my life. Oh and Don't Sweat the Small Stuff is pretty good too. Ps did I use fickle right?
Pps I've decided to write at least one blog a week like I used to. Wish me luck. And I think this deep journalish blog invites a blog on empathy for next week and crying. Dude I've read too many emotional IQ books already this summer. Man this is a long post. Where did I find time to write this?... Oh yeah I need a bedtime and a job still.