I've been working on this on and off for a while now and have tried to make it as detailed as possible before my memory clouds everything. So if you don't like the juicy details, this blog may not be for you. However, if you like cute love stories you might find this interesting. Here's my side of our story:
By the end of 2013, I was through with dating. In fact, I have a drafted blog post on dating I almost posted that says, “I'm done with dating. I think I've given it a pretty good shot after coming home from my mission, but I just don't care anymore.” I had even decided to take off my mission hair tie ring that I had planned to wear on my finger until I had a real ring (wedding ring) to replace it. Needless to say, I was finished. However, I had made a goal for myself to be as active as possible in my singles ward, so to that I was determinedly committed.
If you know me at all, you know that I despise social situations. Once someone described me saying, “Before her mission, she wouldn't be caught dead talking to people,” which is undeniably true. Although, I must say I learned a lot about myself on my mission so now I know I'm at least capable of socializing, but I still hate it with a passion. It's exhausting! I get more tired spending five minutes with a group of people than I do working out at a gym for hours. I even dream of getting put on house arrest so I'll have a great excuse to stay home and avoid people. Anyway, as you can imagine, being involved at church was far from my forte, but I had made a goal and I was sticking to it.
Another goal I had was to go to Institute. I had had some negative experiences with other Institutes in the past so I was kind of worried about going, but when I finally did, it was awesome! I had just split with a boyfriend who broke up with me because I apparently needed to, "Be more on the conservative side of the commandments.” What?! And he was not one to talk in that matter at all, so I was quite frustrated with Law of Moses/ultra-churchyesque-hypocritical type people at the time. But when I got to Institute, Stephen Robinson (former head of BYU Religion Department and writer of “Believing Christ”--Jared's favorite book) was the teacher. He was very down to earth and genuine in his say it like it is "don't be a fruitcake" type of teaching. In the first class I remember feeling so vindicated after my duplicitous Law of Moses boyfriend that I committed to going every week. Once Jared moved into the ward, he started attending Institute too, and when he found one of his favorite authors teaching he also decided to keep going.
I think I noticed Jared at church, but he thinks he noticed me first at Institute. First he noticed a girl in a black Russian hat who he thought was cute and he wanted to talk to her, but she always arrived late and left early (oops! That was me—remember how I hate social situations? ...Yep). There was one day I went straight to Institute from the gym. Of course that was the day Jared noticed me again--in my gross sweaty gym clothes. He says he thought, “Heck with the Russian hat girl, I like this one.” Of course I was the same girl :) He watched me sign the roll to figure out my name and ward and thought, “Hmm I wonder if I'm in that ward?” Guess what? He was!
Jared had started going to a family ward, but in the same building as our singles ward. One day he ran into his grandma's cousin at the church house (who was the wife of the bishop in the singles ward) and she asked him, "Why aren't you in my ward?!” So she got him permission to start coming to our singles ward. I'm not exactly sure of the exact time I noticed Jared, but he definitely made it on my radar. I think I first saw him at church and then Institute and thought, “Hmm, here's a cute guy with blue eyes who regularly attends institute. Hmm...”
I'm sure I've got all the events messed up chronologically but here goes: At one time before I knew him, we had to hold hands at ward prayer for some group game. I remember how natural it felt to be holding hands with Jared even though I didn't yet know his name. It was a little surreal how nice and comfortable it was. The guy on my other hand however was squeezing quite atrociously. It was a very noticeable contrast. I thought, “Hmm...” again, but didn't dwell too much on it.
I started noticing Jared more and more but I still didn't know his name, until I saw his labeled picture on the new member's board in the bishop's office (only perk of being a Relief Society President). After that I Facebook stalked him quite a bit and thought he was even more cute. I had gained a curiosity for him and wanted to learn more.
One day I came late to choir after a presidency meeting so I ended up sitting in the men's section by Jared. I thought he was cute as you know, so by some miracle, I had the guts to ask him what his name was... even though I already knew it. I introduced myself and for the rest of choir we made comments on the random events that pop up in every choir rehearsal. Then there was a fail on my part: after choir that day another guy asked me out. That was frustrating. In my defense though, for a while I thought Jared was interested in another girl. I about gave up on him because I knew this other girl was very beautiful and talented in every area so I didn't stand a chance, but come to find out she was just his cousin! Phew! That was a giant relief.
Another time we were at a ward activity where they were doing conference trivia. I noticed Jared was a very good team player and supportive, unlike other guys who get cocky and arrogant. Cockiness and arrogance have always been the biggest turn offs for me, so Jared's niceness stood out. We started talking after the activity and somehow we left together. I remember thinking, “Is this really happening?! Ahh!!” I always got scared and in denial when I had interest in a guy who seemed to be showing interest back. That fear and denial probably costed me a lot of dates. Luckily Jared survived. I learned that night that he had served a mission in Russia and he figured out that I had been home from my mission in the Philippines for a while so I wasn't an out of age range 18 year old like he had thought. He walked me to my car and was going to ask me on a date but got too nervous he later said (probably due to my fear/denial problem).
That following weekend was the first weekend without my parents around (they had recently left on a mission to France). My sister Joanna was determined that we throw a party at our house to celebrate our freedom. Earlier that Saturday I had gone to the Festival of Colors with some friends and was worn out and covered in chalk. I was in no mood whatsoever for a party, but Joanna insisted. She told me if I invited people, she'd put everything together. So she got a ton of food and I texted a bunch of peeps in the singles ward, including Jared. Of those 25 or so people I texted, guess how many showed up? Just one. Guess who it was? Jared. I was really worried it was going to be awkward. It was just me, Jared, and my two siblings, but it actually turned out to be pretty fun. We chatted with the fam, did puzzles and had a ping-pong tournament. I beat Jared in ping-pong, but he didn't get all weird about it like a lot of guys do. That was nice. Then we watched The Court Jester (btw our wifi's name is now The Black Fox). At the end of the night I walked Jared to the door. He had learned that I played tennis and I was going to say something like, “Hey we should play tennis sometime...” but didn't. Fail! He later said he was going to ask me on a date, but didn't. Fail again!
The next day at church, I was surprised when Jared came and sat next to me in sacrament meeting. We talked more about the Court Jestor and I shared some candy Robin Eggs with him from my purse. (Yes, I always carry treats with me. I'm like a walking food storage.) Those Robin Eggs must've been powerful because after church that day he started texting me about the weather--a great conversation starter no? ;) Then he asked if I'd like to go hangout at his place. I wasn't all too thrilled about it at first because I was in the midst of a relief society visiting teaching assignments crisis. But he offered to come pick me up and agreed to let me bring my laptop to work on visiting teaching. I wasn't sure how I felt about hanging out with someone I wasn't too familiar with on a Sunday and in a place I'd never been, so bringing the laptop was my insurance in case things didn't go well. When we got to his apartment though, it was very warm and welcoming. I was impressed that he had bought all of his own furniture etc., and it was all nice and matching. We sat on his couch and talked for a bit while I did visiting teaching stuff on my computer. I liked how I didn't have to worry about what I was going to say next when I talked with him--again things were so natural. Then we watched some Christian movie called “The Ultimate Gift” and chatted some more. By then it was time for ward prayer. We went there together and arrived early, so I taught him a duet on the piano. Then we sat together, competed in ward prayer activities together and left together. I was very wary of the whole situation because for some reason I thought dating someone in the singles ward was like peeing in the pool and it might affect my availability to the sisters as a relief society president. I told Jared about this later when we started dating and he respected it so we tried not to sit by each other at church gatherings for a time... but that didn't last long at all. It was way too hard. Dumb idea anyway.
Here's a cool part of our story: When he drove me home from ward prayer that night, he stopped in my driveway and asked, “Would you like to go on a date Friday night at 7?” (Btw I Love that he said the word date and used a specific time, instead of just, "Wanna hangout sometime?" What does that even mean?! He also had a plan in mind for the date. Take note gentlemen.) So I said, “I'd love to! Of course! Let me just check my calendar real fast.” So I looked at my calendar for events on Friday at 7 PM and guess what?! Jared was already there! I had already written “Jared :)” in for that exact time on my calendar!! There was a time during work a week or so before where I found myself thinking about Jared during the day. So to get him off my mind, I made a goal to hangout with or talk to Jared by that Friday at 7 PM. I stuck him on my calendar and moved on. I had completely forgotten about that calendar event, until Jared asked me on a date for the exact date and time! Pretty crazy coincidence! The moral of the story is: “Set goals and make plans” as it says in Preach My Gospel. Anyway I of course said yes to the date and didn't tell Jared I already had him booked until a lot later into our relationship.
The next night was FHE and neither of us went for some reason. Then on Tuesday Jared invited me to his house to play guitar hero (I love guitar hero!!). It was actually band hero so I wasn't as experienced, but it was a great time. Then we ended up talking forever and Jared mysteriously figured out my favorite candy bar and sports drink.
The next night was a ward temple night. I rushed to the temple straight from work and barely made it in time. I had missed dinner so my tummy was growling through everything. Jared and I ended up leaving the celestial room together. He asked for me to wait for him after. I wasn't too excited about that because while I was waiting later, one of the bishopric's wives asked me, “Who are you waiting for?” and I remember being embarrassed to say, “...Jared I guess.” I was super shy about everything. Like I said, I was concerned about ward gossip--dumb concern. Finally Jared came out of the dressing room and said something like, "I noticed you seem a little hungry, could I take you out to get some food?” My stomach and I were thrilled! How thoughtful!! We went and got hamburgers at Wendy's which doesn't sound romantic, but sounded perfect for my hungry tummy and is actually one of my favorite places (No joke! I have simple food tastes). After Wendy's Jared asked me what I was doing the next night. I told him I had some plans to “Hang out with friends.” (I actually had a date with someone else... but I considered that person a friend, and we ran into other people I'd call friends on the date. So I was just hanging out with friends right? ;) It was a long planned ROTC formal date that I couldn't really back out of and after all, I wasn't dating Jared exclusively yet. Jared didn't figure that one out until much later ...Oops!)
The next morning however, I walked out to my car to go to work and there on the windshield was my favorite candy bar-- a Butterfinger with a note saying, “ Have a butter-ful day Kat!” How cute! No one had ever done anything like that for me. I still have the note till this day. It's the simple things like that that make me fall more in love with Jared all the time.
On Friday we went on our date. It was the best first date ever!... No really, EVER! It was very fun and relaxing. We went down to Jared's school where he worked. He gave me a tour of the school and we played games outside and in the gym. I noticed Jared was pretty strong doing pull-ups on the jungle gym outside and he was very nice playing basketball, even though he dominated me and I was trying to get him to trash talk. Then he brought out my favorite drink!--Fierce Grape Gatorade, which he had learned and remembered was my favorite. ❤️ The night was still young so we went back to his apartment and watched The King's Speech--Jared edited it for me which I noticed and appreciated. I tend to have a cuddling problem... so we ended up cuddling on the couch. We didn't hold hands or anything though so that got him plenty of brownie points. I don't know why, but sometimes an early on hand holding obligation gets a little too obnoxious for me. After the date when Jared was dropping me back at home, he surprised me by asking me then and there if I wanted to “go steady” (who uses “go steady” anymore? Lol;) I still tease him about that) I was in a bit of shock. He said he'd never asked anyone that on a first date and I thought, “Who has?!” That was pretty surprising. I didn't know what to do. Inside I was thinking, “Yeah, I want to date this guy officially, everything feels right," but at the same time out of principle I couldn't just date someone after only one date! So I scrambled my words up there and didn't really give him a clear answer until I after date texted him and apologized for not being so clear and said I'd like to date him, but I'd also like to think about it first. So that was that, we were almost officially dating.
The next day he left to Texas on vacation for a week. Every day he would send 20-30 pictures of everything he was doing. I had all week to think about Jared and told some of my girl friends about him. One of my friends later claimed "she knew” by how I was talking about him that this was something special. Anyway Jared told me he was coming back on Sunday. I was leaving for Vegas with my Sister on Sunday so we were a bit bummed we'd miss each other. On late Saturday afternoon, Jared texted me that he was still in New Mexico (Lies!). I told him I was on my way to go visit my grandma with Joanna. But then he suddenly texted, “Wait, can you wait to leave for ten minutes?” That was weird... I thought maybe he had ordered flowers or something that were supposed to arrive? I was convinced he was for sure still driving somewhere. Little did I know... Moments later the doorbell rang. I answered it and there was Jared standing on the porch! He had driven through the night just to surprise me! He brought me a rose and his cute stuffed bear named Lewis. (I have a major weakness for stuffed animals. That right there is probably why I married him! ;) jk) How could I not be his girlfriend after that?!
That night we decided to hangout before I left. We just cuddled and watched Transformers. I told him I had made a decision and I was ready to officially be official. That was exciting. Then I left for Vegas. I took Lewis with me and took pictures with him everywhere. I had him eating breakfast, sitting by slot machines, going to shows, laying at the pool and seat-belted driving in the car etc. That was lots of fun for me. I still take Lewis with me places when Jared won't be around. After those two weeks though, Jared and I decided to never go on vacations alone if we could help it.
When I got back, it was the weekend of my birthday. I had always had a dream of having an Easter Egg Hunt in my family's backyard and that year I was going to make it happen. For hours one night Jared helped me clear out junk from my parent's yard. I took pictures of him working hard in his work gloves without him knowing and sent them to my family. They all thought he was a keeper after that.
Maybe the day before our backyard cleaning, we celebrated my birthday. Jared had to miss my real birthday because his Great Aunt died and he had to go up to Logan for the funeral. It was probably my best birthday ever. When I got home from work I discovered a bunch of my favorite treats and a scavenger easter egg hunt. Jared had me go pick up eggs at all the significant places in our meeting each other/dating life. The hunt ended at a park where I found Jared waiting with a cake he'd made by himself (his first) and a cute birthday sweatshirt. After eating cake, we hiked around the park looking for a biking trail Jared liked, but we ended up looking for my grandparents in the Orem cemetery instead. Lol very romantic no? But everything is always fun with Jared, not to mention we were holding hands. Sigh;) Then we went back to my house and watched a James Bond movie. I don't think we watched very much of it because that's when we had our first kiss—my best birthday present ever! It was the only time in my life that I had actually anticipated and enjoyed a first kiss.
Anyway the rest is history. That's the early beginnings of our dating life. On later dates we went to the tulip festival, celebrated Jared's birthday, camped at Bryce canyon, almost died getting hit by a tire on the freeway, went to the SCERA Shell, played Disney Infinity, went to Cornbellies, had a candle light dinner with cocoa puffs, went to seven peaks, chilled at the Provo temple and a bunch of other fun things. Jared was/is an expert dater. He was also an expert proposer, but our engagement story deserves its own post. The bottom line is, I have an expert husband. He's the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't know how I got so blessed to be with such a sweet man forever. I love you Jared!!
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